Getting my oldest son ready for school in the morning was one of my least favorite tasks. Without fail we would end up fighting. He didn’t move fast enough and I wouldn’t let him be.
For weeks I tried different approaches to helping him get ready. I’d yell expecting him to stop dilly dallying and start focusing. I helped him, reminded him, encouraged him and ignored him, all in an attempt to figure out how I could get him out the door on time. Nothing worked. There were moments when I thought we were making progress only to end up running late again.
Then I was asked to read and write a review on a book entitled “No More Perfect Kids” by Jill Savage and Dr. Kathy Koch. As I began to read I soon realized God was speaking to me and showing me how my parenting was affecting my son’s morning.
Jill Savage and Dr. Kathy Koch do an excellent job at addressing what they call “Perfection Infection.”
“Perfection Infection- the effect on our minds and spirits of the widespread, sanitized, airbrushed standards we see every day in the world around us and our deplorable tendency to compare ourselves.”
We live in a world where comparing and having that “perfect” persona is spread everywhere from Facebook and Pinterest to the magazines covers that plaster the grocery store checkout lines. It’s hard not to parent our children with an unreal expectation to be perfect. Jill and Kathy not only address the dangers of perfection infection parenting, but give simple tools to help parents release the perfect expectation and free their children to be the best that God created them to be.
This book changed how I approached our school morning battles.
“When our children do less than a great job on something, we don’t want a pattern of sloppy work or mistakes to take root so we indicate we’re concerned, unhappy, or disappointed. But, depending on how we respond to their work, children can misinterpret our concerns. They may believe we can never be satisfied and that perfection is what we want. They may not be able to separate their work from themselves, thinking they are their work. If Daddy doesn’t like my work, he doesn’t like me.”
Instead of critiquing or trying to perfect my son’s decisions, I gave him the freedom to be who he really was. Even when that means he’ll go to school without combing his hair. His smile and our peaceful mornings are priceless.
Exciting news about “No More Perfect Kids”:
- Buy this book during the week of March 13-23 and you’ll receive $100 worth of resources FREE. Yes, you read that right…FREE! It’ll include audio workshops, e-books, e-booklets and great printables. You don’t want to miss this great deal!! (save your receipt so you can take a photo of it or scan it and send it to a special email so you can get your FREE resources.)
- And, if you are looking for a little more motivation and encouragement when it comes to the Perfection Infection in your parenting, jump over to the “No More Perfect” blog and join the No More Perfect Kids 13 day challenge. (You can sign up at any time.) You’ll be glad you did!